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Pathfindersonline • View topic - It sucks when....

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 Post subject: It sucks when....
PostPosted: Sat Dec 10, 2005 7:21 pm 
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It sucks when the people you count on, the ones you believe in end up failing you. It sucks when you catch your pathfinder directors lieing to you. has this ever happened to anyone else? :x


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 11, 2005 2:33 pm 
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Wow!!! That's rough! I can't say that my leader has ever lied to me although they have treated me and my friend unfairly. We basically get grounded during a camporee because there was a misunderstanding about what was said and we did something we weren't supposed to do. I have felt that my co-leader was failing the club sometimes. I hope things go better for you sara. God Bless!

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Katie Lenz
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Once a Pathfinder, always a Pathfinder!

"Don't wait for the one you can live with, wait for the one you can't live without."


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 11, 2005 5:03 pm 
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Thank you! yeah, unfourtanetly, my directors have not once, but twice lied to me. well my directors wife who is also a director. she loves to gossip and was caught this time but, isnt fessing up to it. but all evidence points to her. all i want is some honesty, is that too much to ask for? well im glad i left that pathfinder group. thanks for listening!


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 11, 2005 6:20 pm 
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No problem...that's what I'm here for.

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Katie Lenz
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Once a Pathfinder, always a Pathfinder!

"Don't wait for the one you can live with, wait for the one you can't live without."


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Dec 17, 2005 8:19 pm 
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Location: Wisconsin
yah my directors lie to me all the time. they are my parents.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 17, 2005 9:50 pm 
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Ouch, that's not very kind. You know your parents love you... you shouldn't be mean to them.

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“When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze”
Isaiah 43:1-3


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 Post subject: On lieing and trust
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 12:30 pm 
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Location: North American Division Pathfinder Ministries
Hello!

Some questions to guide your feelings of frustration and mistrust. . .

1. Are there other ways that the lies could have been understood by others such as your directors?

2. Were there reasons (though possibly invalid) which may have helped them choose to lie (like trying to protect you or others?)

3. Is it easier to see faults in others when they are near and dear to you than casual friends or acquaintences?

4. How do you choose to react to this breaking of trust? Do you choose to "turn the other cheek" or instead react in a way that is as negative or more negative than the initial action?

5. WWJD? I know that sounds trite and maybe even old fashioned, but from the gospel accounts of Jesus' life, he seems to have reacted to life and challenged us to react to life in a way that is DIFFERENT than we would expect, and definitely different than what we FEEL like doing. . .

6. What boundaries do you set up so that other people's lack of character development doesn't slow down your character development or cause you to sin (Psalms 4:4 ).

Hope this helps. . . .

Mark O'Ffill

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We are His Hands, touching the World Wide Web around us. . . .


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Dec 21, 2005 7:33 pm 
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yah I know.I'm not mean to them.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Dec 24, 2005 9:17 am 
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Location: Upper Columbia Conference!

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Dec 28, 2005 8:43 pm 
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When they lie to me I really don't think that much about it because they tell other people on the phone when are whole family is in the car so I find out anyway.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Jan 28, 2006 1:22 pm 
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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 10:21 pm 
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when pples lie to me it makes it really hard to trust them again.. :cry:
i guess thats my bigest thing...well and it makes me frikin mad...
cuase it makes me feel like i cant be trusted and i like it when pple frust me....so ya it makes it really hard to forgive when ur mad at them...and cuase they have hurt u...yep just my theory... :smt102

Rebecca


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 22, 2006 5:53 am 
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Location: Wisconsin
for some reason i can always trust my parents if they lie to me but if a friend does that it is so much harder.this happened to me last year and i can't even talk to the ppl that did it.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 7:08 pm 
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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Sep 22, 2006 7:02 pm 
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at this camporee i notice alot more dishonesty then usual. and it wasnt just in my group. there naturaly was the general rules that had no purpose and unfair ideals but this last campree i atended there was much more in other groups to. i know certain groups that had unfair TLT rules. one TLT was allowed to make all hte decisions and every thing. the others wernt eve nallowed to go any where without adult supervision. adn they wouldnt tell teh truth about why. they hardly even gave an answer. there wer other poeple that had items that there was no rule agaist confiscated and ruined. and the reason befind this was never revealed truthfully. there were also some false preachings circling around. every one in the bible had somthing bad happen to them becouse of there bad attitude. funny how if anyone wanted to question the truthfulness of a stament or ask what they did wrong it was automaticly taken as having a bad attitude. aperently in one group they were told that lucifer was kicked out of heaven becouse of a bad attitude. if that is not brainwashing and lying i dont know what is. i was one of the lucky people but some pathfinders really got the short end of the stick this year.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Sep 29, 2006 6:27 pm 
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I wonder where you came to thinking that the Pathfinders in your area are dishonest. That's really a shame. :( I'm also curious to what rules you think of as having "no purpose" and that had "unfair ideals".

Maybe things aren't really as bad as you think. I don't know how TLT's is ran in your club, but is is called Teen Leadership Training for a reason. The TLT program's ultimate goal is to train us teens to become leaders capable of leading and/or counseling a unit or even running a club. So if you as a TLT in your club aren't really being able to exercise your leadership skills, I'd definitely talk to the TLT director or your club director about further involvement of the TLT program in the functioning of the club.

When you look at it, people other clubs not being able to go anywhere isn't really "dishonest". Maybe the staff felt uncomfortable answering about giving a reason for kids not to roam about alone. If they were, I can give some reasons for the rule.

-It's a safety issue. If somebody leaves without any degree of adult supervision and they don't come back, staff will not know where to look.

-It's an accountability issue. If somebody gets in trouble and the leader does not know about it, the leader may get a chunk of the accountability for the bad behavior of the Pathfinder. If the behavior is bad enough, it may even bais other clubs' views of the club with the "naughty pathfinders"

The above points standing, as long as two same-gendered TLTs can be trusted together and they need to go somewhere to run an errand, they usually should be allowed. But not knowing the specific situation of the clubs in your area or conference, I can't really make an authorative standpoint on this issue.

Regarding the confiscated items; it would be nice to get more specifics on what was confiscated. There may have been a good reason they were taken, but without specifics and context that's a hard point to discuss.

The same applies to these "false teachings". It would be nice if you volunteered more information for a more lively, informative discussion. I wouldn't go to say that everyone in the Bible had everything bad happen to them happen because of a bad attitude. True, a lot of people--good people at that--had bad things happen to them because of attitude problems, (Abraham was impatient and had momentary lapses of faith in God and caused him and his family great woe, but yet he still is listed in Hebrews as one of the faithful) but a bad attitude didn't cause every single problem. I can see why they say Satan was kicked out of heaven for a bad attitude. Satan's attitude was self-centered; he wanted to be equal to God. This bad attitude spawned sin in his heart and ultimately led 1/3 of the angels of heaven to develop "bad attitudes" filled with spite and mistrust towards God. Discussion about what you believe regarding a certain biblical subject at worship is very healthy.

When you try to think about what you think is wrong without the connotations that the staff is out to get you, and you think about the issue with and open mind and look at it in-depth, you may find out that automatically thinking that everything is dishonest may have been giving you or others who think the same way the short end of the stick.

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Jonathan Thomas
15 years old. Second Year TLT.
Pioneer guidon of the Central New Hampshire Flames.


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